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    Home » Be Happier » I did the Hoffman Process. Here’s what happened

    I did the Hoffman Process. Here’s what happened

    Published: Oct 16, 2020 · Last Modified: Oct 29, 2020 by Caren · This post may contain affiliate links

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    The hoffman process and a woman suffering with limiting beliefs

    A few weeks ago, I went through an abbreviated version of the Hoffman Process.  It was an online version of what is typically in-person intensive.  This post provides a review of what happened and what I got from it.

    What is the Hoffman Process?  Is it a cult?

    No, not a cult.  Or if it is, they didn’t ask me to join.

    That said, the Hoffman Process does go deep into the “woo”.  If the idea of healing your inner child or stomping out your fears and beliefs (literally) makes you want to cringe, then maybe this isn’t for you.  Or maybe it is absolutely for you!

    I'm someone who’s not comfortable with woo-woo-ness, but I do see the value in self-development and spiritual exploration, which is why I signed up.  Plus my inner child has been triggered a lot this year (who’s hasn’t?), so I thought it was prudent to give her a chance to grow up.

    Hoffman Process Online vs In Person

    In “normal’ times (2020 has been anything but normal), this process is done over a week-long, in-person workshop.  I can’t tell you how happy I am that I didn’t do that.  It would have been too much people-ing for my introverted self. 

    Instead, the 2-day, Zoom-based weekend workshop was the perfect amount of time to get a taste of the Hoffman techniques and still enjoy sleeping in my own bed at night. It’s also a lot cheaper ($500 for the online process vs $5000 in person).

    How it works

    After you sign up, you’re asked to write a few paragraphs about your childhood experience, and any limiting beliefs that you want to focus on over the course of the experience.  Then you read a short essay on the Hoffman Process and the theory that it works from.

    The premise of the Hoffman Process, is to break the negative habits, behaviors and beliefs we have based on a “negative love syndrome”.  

    In a nutshell, we create negative patterns based on our experience relating to our parents.  Everything we do as children is to obtain our parent's love and approval. It shapes who we are and how we operate in the world.  The Hoffman process provides the tools and experiences we need to look at who we are objectively and stop destructive patterns.  

    What kind of things do you do during the Hoffman Process?

    Well, again, I only did the online version, which is an abbreviation of the full monty, but there was a lot of journaling, meditating, body movement and sharing.  Oh yes, you will be asked to share and its every bit as awkward as it sounds.  Again, thank God for the anonymity of Zoom.

    Here's a few things we were taught that I found helpful.

    Quadrinity: The Four Aspects of Self

    One of the most profound things we went through in the process was learning and connecting to the quadrinty - the four essential parts of the self.  This includes the body, the intellect, the emotional self and the spiritual self.  

    Part of the work is identifying feelings in the body, which was truly profound for me. So much of our personal trauma is stored in the body, and when you’re guided to tap into it and express it, you can achieve immediate healing.  This is something I experienced first hand and it’s the primary reason why I would recommend this program to anyone.  

    We all have traumas, big and small, stored in our bodies from a very young age that we carry throughout our lives.  The more we can accept and release these traumas, the lighter we’ll be.  

    Growing up your Emotional Self

    Another practice I found really interesting was the process of going inward to find your emotional self, and clearly seeing how old he or she is.  Even though we age and mature, every often our emotional self gets stunted from growth in our childhood. 

    I clearly saw my emotional self as a seven-year-old and I was able to bring her up to my age.  While I still see an inner child in myself, she no longer represents my emotional maturity, which is a beautiful thing.

    Stomping out out old beliefs

    One of the most interesting exercises was listing out our limiting beliefs (they call them “patterns”, putting that list in front of you, going into a meditation, then standing up and stomping on them for a solid 10 minutes. 

    I’m not going to lie, I thought it was super cheesy, but once I got into it, the tears started flowing and low and behold, my energy shifted.

    My Thoughts & Review of the Hoffman Process

    Overall, I found the weekend to be very beneficial.  It was cathartic, I learned a lot about myself and how I hold myself back.  As many others have said, I did feel “lighter” after the experience, because I felt like I had offloaded some emotional baggage.  

    Specifically, I don’t take things people say to me quite so personally as I used to, and I’m less triggered by the behavior of others.  It hasn’t changed my reality, just the way I interpret the actions of others, which is a big deal.

    Who is the Hoffman Process for?

    I think it’s for anyone who has the desire to change.  I feel like this is a very specific person, because not all of us are ready to look honestly at ourselves and see where we’re holding ourselves back.  

    Personally, I feel like you need to get to a point where you’re so sick of your own BS, that you’re willing to do awkward things and throw some money at your own recovery.  Not everyone is there yet, and that’s okay.  

    I also think you have to be willing to get personal and vulnerable around people you don’t really know.  Granted, they are strangers so there is some comfort in that, but sharing your personal weaknesses is part of the healing process.  Ironically, it’s when you speak them out loud, you notice others nodding with familiarity. When you realize that we all share similar fears, the shame associated with them disappears.

    Was this review helpful?

    If you have specific questions about the Hoffman Process, feel free to drop a comment below.  I am not in anyway affiliated with them, but I just felt it was a super helpful practice.  

    You can also learn more about the Hoffman Process from this Tim Ferris podcast with Blake Mycoskie, The founder of Toms Shoes.  He goes through his experience, which is what drove me to try it.  

    More Resources on the Hoffman Process

    If you're curious about the process and you want to learn more about it before investing in a workshop, I recommend the following resources:

    • Follow the Hoffman Process on Instagram
    • Listen to their Podcast
    • Check out their blog
    • Check out their Youtube Channel

    Question for you - Would you ever drop $500 on a personal development program?  I know that’s a significant amount of money, but it’s hard to put a price on your personal wellbeing. 

    Caren

    Caren is a certified yoga teacher, fitness instructor and ADHD Coach.  As the founder of The Fit Habit, she shares ADHD-friendly self-care, food & fitness inspiration, along with practical ways to foster mind + body wellness.

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    Reader Interactions

    Comments

    1. Rachel

      May 31, 2021 at 6:43 am

      Hey - now quite a few months later down you still find it helpful and are you still glad you did the weekend? I want to work on loving myself more, trusting myself and believing I am worthy of finding a partner (stop chasing men.) I can’t afford the time or money for the full week but was curious about the zoom weekend

      Reply
      • Caren

        May 31, 2021 at 10:11 am

        Rachel, thanks for reaching out. While I found this program to be helpful, it's not something I would recommend if you are stretched for time or money. I feel like it was a nice-to-have, but not a life-altering experience. I got just as much value from starting a meditation and yoga practice. Also diving into self-development books/podcasts are helpful.

        I'm not trying to deter you from diving in, but there's a lot you can do before dropping that kind of money on a program.

        I hope you find the peace you're looking for!!!

        Reply
        • Maggie

          November 14, 2022 at 11:36 am

          Thanks for your thoughts on Hoffman . I’m wondering if you had attended the in-person program if you would have felt it worth the money. It is life changing. For me it was five years of great therapy in seven days. Well with the investment in a time when I had to go into debt to attend.

          Reply
    2. Suzanne

      July 25, 2021 at 3:20 pm

      Hi,
      Do you think this would help a narcissist, if he was open to it?
      Thanks,
      Suzanne

      Reply
      • Caren

        July 27, 2021 at 11:04 am

        I don't think a narcisisst would be willing to go...

        Reply
    3. Ola

      October 26, 2021 at 3:13 am

      No. I wouldn't throw $500 on a personal development program. Because I don't have as much. It's hard to put a price on your personal wellbeing, sure. But apparently wellbeing is something only rich people should have.

      Reply
      • Caren

        October 30, 2021 at 10:06 pm

        It's all a matter of priorities, Ola.

        Reply
      • annette

        June 07, 2022 at 5:42 am

        The Hoffman process has a scholarship fund for those who aren’t able to pay for it.

        Reply
      • Lynnss

        July 23, 2022 at 6:18 pm

        If you had attached, attuned parenting to start with, regardless of your income, you might not need as much wellbeing improvement and help. Well-being is for people lucky to have had good parenting.

        Given that your comment sounds pretty snarky I’m guessing you didn’t get that. Me neither.

        $500 is cheaper than a few talk therapy sessions or one psych session. I’d do it.

        As Carin mentioned there are plenty of Free and low cost self help books/meditation to get you somewhere.

        Reply
    4. Richie

      December 30, 2021 at 12:51 pm

      Yes. I've spent the last 30 years pursuing meditation retreats and spending most of my free time and money on that sort of thing. Until recently I must say I thought that therapy was a crock. But self-discovery leads to less resistance - to the Woo Woo side of things.

      Reply
    5. Michelle

      December 31, 2021 at 2:55 pm

      I am taking part in the process next weekend. I applied and received a significant scholarship. Thank you for review as I feel better prepared after reading it.

      Reply
    6. RUDOLPH MICHAELS

      February 21, 2022 at 9:27 am

      Caren,

      Thank you very much for sharing your experience with The Hoffman Process. Surely it will be helpful for others to decide if they are ready for such an investment in themselves. I consult, coach, advise and teach and I have considered suggesting this method to others. Your experience and comments were of value.

      Thank you

      Reply
    7. David

      May 08, 2022 at 12:28 am

      I attended the process in 1997, the 7 day residential in California. It is now 2022 and I can tell you all it sticks. A life changing event for me. My outlook on life and dealing with others has changed (for the better)ever since. I have more clarity. My relationships have all been much better. I am much happier in life, with myself and my choices. I urge anyone who is really ready to understand how they have become who they are to explore this. It will give you back as much as you put into it. Thank you Caren for sharing as I am trying to help a friend. All the best

      Reply
    8. Annette

      June 07, 2022 at 5:36 am

      Even more, I paid the whole bunch for the in person version back in 2017 and it was worth every penny!! It’s drastically life-changing, there’s an active community which can be very comforting in stressful times (like 2020/21 was). Still benefits from my process every day and my in person group became very dear friends.

      Reply
    9. Lillie

      January 04, 2023 at 2:14 pm

      Wu. Not “woo”
      Google it.

      Reply
      • Caren

        January 16, 2023 at 3:49 pm

        Nope.... it's Woo.

        Reply

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    I'm an ADHD coach & wellness expert with a mind that runs faster than a quick-dry nail polish. I have figured out how to master my ADHD brain through fitness, healthy eating and self-care and I get a thrill out of helping other women like me, do the same. You may or may not have ADHD, but somewhere after 40, most of us end up wondering why our jeans are tight and our brains are foggier than summer in San Francisco. If that's you, I'm here to help. Welcome!

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